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oh what the hell   
12:59pm 05/02/2006
  Take these words in. Take them like you did that foreign excitement. You bleed lust. Choke. So was it worth it? Did you get what you wanted, the silent type. Did you even come close, did they make you taste it? I can see how the rush, and the heat, and the touch of a stranger gets you going. You're feeling selfish, you've got the urge. Don't bother keeping your heavy breathing down for the one who can't hear you scream.

Never pass of your guilt lines, just wear them like a noose on your neck, I'll help you keep it tied tight. When you feel your close to coming, just think about that perfect subtle demon that you've been dreaming into the light, keep it tied tight.

Unlike the way you've become "city feature", you'd love to let them rip you apart until you feel clean, but when it's over he won't take back what is left. I can see how the sting, and the speed, and the wings of the plane home make you nervous. Oh, Mr. Shoddy Content, swept all your dignity under the covers, she'll be lying, keeping secrets, keeping quiet. Now you understand what it's like to dive. Take it back, taken back, she forgets you. Now she pleads "Forgive me again, it's the last time I will..."

Never pass of your guilt lines, just wear them like a noose on your neck, I'll help you keep it tied tight. You're the worst actor that I've ever seen but if this script called for liars, you'd play the lead. "When you've changed, I'll change" what it's like again. What you don't see while you sleep...3 year deciever, you're not fooling.

Never pass of your guilt lines, just wear them like a noose on your neck, I'll help you keep it tied tight. You're the worst actor that I've ever seen but if this script called for liars, you'd play the lead.
     pick at my flesh
11:08am 13/01/2006
  im done with this whole lj thing...its gay  
     4 cut through me -  pick at my flesh
ill let our love survive, ill dry the tears from her eyes   
02:54pm 09/01/2006
  cought in a trap...i cant walk out becuz i love u to much baby. why cant u see what ur doin to me when u dont beleive a word im sayin. we can go on together with suspicious minds, and we can build our dreams in suspicious lives  
     pick at my flesh
fuck that   
01:07am 09/01/2006
  change of plans..no new york...i like it here...i dont need change...cuz ill find in the end...this is home  
     pick at my flesh
who will save us? this cant go on   
04:38pm 29/12/2005
  im moving to new york in may....and thats final  
     4 cut through me -  pick at my flesh
pathos of the future   
11:00pm 18/12/2005
  darkness is falling...dead on arival..blood trickling down the eyes of the beast...u can hear him screaming out in silence as her last rose peddle falls to the dusty ground. evil thoughts are brewing in his head...missing that sweet spot between her legs..sweat blood and tears evaporating in the air as his body decays to nothing. old moldy passion spews like throw up from his bowels..killing his last breaths as her very life flashes before his eyes. he can see her laughing...she is standing there naked with teeth like a vampire ready to devower his soul and finish the job. silence...the ghost of tomarrow appears and helps up the beast with its warm fingers. his sharp nails start searching for a vein to burst in her giddy throat. as she screams in agony he asks her if the situation was reversed if she wud show him mercy and let him continue to wander the night...she sobs out yes with helpless gasps of desparity. as he looks in her eyes one last time he notices that look...the look that says "i love u" the look she's givin him oh so many times. those eyes like the universe. then the blood sprays out of her jugular and those deceptive eyes are finnaly destroyed..and those 2 faced lips silenced. with that, the beast collapses...becuz he cant live without her..but he can die in peace knowing she got what she desearved.  
     2 cut through me -  pick at my flesh
the only one   
01:40pm 09/12/2005
  work sucks...party hard tonizzle!!!!!!!!!! eh... dot com  
     1 cut through me -  pick at my flesh
the year of 2005   
04:38pm 08/12/2005
  1) Was 2005 a good year for you?
half of it was amazing

2) What was your favorite moment of the year?
when this one girl kissed me for the first time

3) What was your least favorite moment of the year?
this one night i went insain after ingestinjg a couple bottles of wine

4) Where were you when 2005 began?
ana's house

5) Who were you with?
everyone worth anything

6) Where will you be when 2005 ends?
hopefuly new york if i can get off work

7) Who will you be with when 2005 ends?
with the bitches

8) Did you keep your new years resolution of 2005?

9) Do you have a new years resolution for 2006?

10) Did you fall in love in 2005?

11) If yes who?
that tall girl

12) If yes, do they know?
u kno...prolly

13) Are you still in love with them?

14) You regret it?
i cant no matter how much i want to

15) Did you breakup with anyone in 2005?

16) Did you make any new friends in 2005?
fuck yea!!!

17) Who are your favorite friends?
oh u guys kno exactly who you are...and i love u dearly

18) What was your favorite month of 2005?
prolly june

19) Did you travel outside of the US in 2005?

20) How many different states did you travel to in 2005?
hmm a couple?

21) Did you lose anybody close to you in 2005?
u cud say so

22) Did you miss anybody in the past year?
oh yess

23) What was your favorite movie that you saw in 2005?
star wars III

24) What was your favorite song from 2005?
down and out- the academy is

25) What was your favorite record from 2005?
panic! at the disco

26) How many concerts did you see in 2005?
not many

27) Did you have a favorite concert in 2005?

28) Did you drink a lot of alcohol in 2005?
hahah alot is an understatement

29) Did you do a lot of drugs in 2005?
i did a lil

30) Did you do anything out of character in 2005?

31) Did you do anything you are ashamed of this year?

33) What was the worst lie someone told you in 2005?
i can think of a couple

34) Did you treat somebody badly in 2005?

35) Did somebody treat you badly in 2005?

36) How much money did you spend in 2005?
all of it

37) What was your proudest moment of 2005?
wakeing up feeling hungover and going swimming with the people that made it impossable for me to frown

38) What was your most embarrassing moment of 2005?
the cabin

39) If you could go back in time to any moment of 2005 and change something, what would it be?
despit all the bullshit...i couldnt change anything

40) What are your plans for 2006?
college...and hopefuly love
     pick at my flesh
03:31pm 08/12/2005
  they say its better to have loved and lost then never to have loved at all...and they r right..i jus wish the lost part never happened to anyone...its not fair  
     2 cut through me -  pick at my flesh
u laughed so hard that the pain went away   
07:14pm 06/12/2005
  to my dear sweet impailer

these are my dieing words..and i will fall and break down at ur knees.
in the end, though, ill be the one dancing the night away. have u forgotten all your long term promises? how about the words that crumbled away with ur terse commitment? go ahead..break me down...tear my lims out of socket. in the end, though, ill be the one dancing the night away. i do, however, wish u could remember those velcrow nights laying in silence and ill forgotten vows...the troths of "forever" that ended too soon. cuz as these tears plague my eyelids the eyes of the oceans are there to say "i told u so". but one day you'll feel the pain i feel..and when that day comes u better wish upon a star, and hide behind ur pillow...but then again; the oceans eyes will still see you cry. so in the end, ill be the one dancing the night away.
     pick at my flesh
last night without u   
09:38pm 05/12/2005
  i do believe u will have regrets...baby girl i sure love u...ouch  
     pick at my flesh
i kno u best   
01:52am 01/12/2005
  i know it's hopeless when i look to the sky and the stars spell out your name  
     pick at my flesh
03:33pm 18/11/2005
  happy birthday to me!!  
     5 cut through me -  pick at my flesh
i hate that i cant hate u   
03:05pm 17/11/2005
mood: cold
my birthday is tomarrow...i feel like i shud be happy or excited...but im not. christmas is coming up soon and im really not looking fwd to that either..i dont mean to be a scruge but sometimes i feel like theres no point in celebrating something alone. my birthday wupidyfuckindoo- i just get a lil older, no more leagal, and im jus gonna do pretty much the same thing i do every friday. and ill prolly go to sleep unhappy. or not be able to sleep at all. christmas- my family hates me and i have no girl to share it with..to hold...to buy things for. i dont kno yet but i think i may be going away for a while..i need sum me time to figure out what it is im doing here. or what it is i want..or how to get it. im so confused about everything...i just wanna be that dru again...the one who can laugh openly...the one whose never trying to cover sumting up or going thru intearnal abominations.
     2 cut through me -  pick at my flesh
01:27pm 04/11/2005
  to the beach...ill see all my friends when i get back  
     1 cut through me -  pick at my flesh
huuung ovvvvaaaaaa   
01:15pm 30/10/2005
  what a fuckin night  
     8 cut through me -  pick at my flesh
i need a real vacation   
01:44pm 26/10/2005
  my mom leaves for vegas today  
     1 cut through me -  pick at my flesh
hey bitch wait till u see my dick   
07:02pm 24/10/2005
  im hungry...i think maybe ill eat. i wanna go out to lunch tomarrow....any takers? if u dont call me i promise i will call u unless i dont like u so if thats the case...ull kno if i like u or not by weather u get a phone call or not. anyway i have nothing to report except i wudnt mind smokin tonight.  
     pick at my flesh
04:10pm 21/10/2005
  went to kennesaw last night and got krunk nasty with walker and tony...lost miserably in a game of poker and lost 15 bux in the process. what a great night! my car is fucked up and im pissed! i need a new starter. tonight is drink beer night...rock n roll
good times. great oldies. fox 97.
so..anyone wanna date me?
     pick at my flesh
01:51pm 20/10/2005
  more work  
     2 cut through me -  pick at my flesh